On Today’s Episode of Hot Mess Momma

My mom and I work at the same hospital, only in different departments. We also happen to be neighbors. My brother needed to use her car one day, so the night before she asked me if she could ride home with us. I told her, “Why not just come with us in the morning so he doesn’t have to drop you off?” (Secretly I was saying that because getting everyone out the door is hectic and I love when I get help.)

I assured her we would be on time. She starts 15 minutes before me and, well, I’m often late. You’re about to find out why… 

I must have turned off my alarm at some point because I remember it going off at the right time and thinking “I could stay in bed 5 more minutes.” Next thing I know, I hear my mom saying “Sandra! Its after 7!” I shoot up and the first thing I think is: “my mom just saw my boobs…” I sleep topless these days since I still breastfeed at night. Sure, she saw them when I was in labor and butt-naked, but I don’t think it’s something she wants to see on a regular basis.

In the commotion, Luke wakes up and is fake crying. I have no clue why, but I didn’t have time to play that game. I take him in the living room and turn on Blippi, the toddler whisperer. He goes into zombie mode and lets my mom dress him while I frantically try and pull out everyone’s clothes. Since I knew I’d have help, I didn’t even lay out any clothes the night before.

Everyone else starts to get up and my mom starts to dress them. The threenager is not impressed. She is refusing her shoes because they are not the ones she wants. I tell her to pick any closed toe shoes, any! None of them meet her liking. After a long back and forth battle she asks for the original ones we tried putting on her.

We woke up at 7:11 and we made it to the car by 7:43, impressive if I don’t say so myself. I get my mom to work on time and make it to work only a tad late, not too bad though. I go to the café to get some coffee. By 9:30, I was back getting more. Work was wild. My coworker was on her 3rd day out and it’s one of those “is it a full moon?” days. Everyone was being difficult. I was so hyped on caffeine, I did something ridiculous.

I went to call my Monday evaluations. I schedule for speech therapy at a hospital. I called them all in time order then got to the last one. I dial and as its ringing in my ear one of the therapist is talking in the other. My cell phone is ringing at the same time and I silence it. I hear the voicemail missed call and phone number and start to leave a message: “Hi, this is Sandra calling from pediatric rehab to remind you of Domini….” I hang up. It was me. I called myself to remind me of my sons appointment. I dialed my own number, listened to the recording say my number, and never realized I was calling myself until I started saying my son’s name.

To top it off, I forgot my mom… I completely forgot I was her ride and started driving my happy ass to the daycare when she called me to see where we were meeting. Thankfully I didn’t make it too far. And that my friends is just another day in the life of me!

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